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Sunday, 30 November 2008

But You:

What is this feeling that evokes such emotion
that makes me miss you so when your not here
how I do smile when you are near
an how much my heart does leap when I see your smile
you have come and changed me so
made me but a proud and better man
with your wise words & soothing touch
and when you comfort me so guide me more
I am but complete
when I look upon you so I see but you
your eyes the windows into the very center of you
your racing beating wild heart
and all at once I am alive charged with need
desire heightened my craving longing inside
fires rage and the burning deepens
and all at once I am in wanton of you
reaching out to feel your hand in mine
your body close to me in tender embrace
oh how I long for that moment to last for all eternity
as we lay together under the moonlit sky's
your body rising with each breath as you pull closer to me
and to you I have this great draw
as if being called from afore and wide
all my flesh all my senses coursing with unbridled desire
the want to touch and feel you so
too listen to your voice carried on the winds
hearing your message over and over
like that of a favourite sonnet never lost
and when apart from you so
my heart does not beat
and body not breath
but when you grace me with your entrance
once again I am but at peace with all
my heart does beat an I do but breathe
as if for you and I as but one....


Refresh Me So:

Walking upon the beach this day
the night carried her storms inland
I watch her raise her head so
beckoning unto me to lay in her arms
she crashes and roars
as if begging for me to be consumed
by her so in deep blue waters
calling unto me with a deep voice
of utter conviction
and all at once I realise
that if i do I am surely right were I want to be
her waters running over me so
cooling me to my very core
resting and easing my myriad of thoughts
refreshing my soul easing my troubles
I watch as the life springs forth eternal
and slowly but surely
I sink further into the depths of her
allowing her to caress me
too tease me too show me
all that there is to this life of mine
the echoes of afore and of now
and of the ultimate future
are but
left resounding in my inner ears so
and all at once
I realise I am but all and everything
on this here earth with her
my ocean blue sea....

Lost & Forgotten:

Tis been many a year I have walked but this great land of mine
tolled and tilled the very earth waiting for its summer rewards
watched as the great sun lifted in the sky
lighting this glorious might of all afore me
tis been a generation come all seasons
and in the cold the frost did cover alot like that if a ice lake
Ive raised all my life lifted and buried
but now as I walk this very land
I realise I am but a old man
weathered and tired
with nothing left to give or pass on
to anyone that cares
all so much has changed and now
there is nothing but.. emptiness
how soon we are forgotten
and how soon all we do and have done
is left to the echoed halls
of a old mans life....


It comes to pass in this time
that we all have to leave
all we have ever known
and all that we hold dear
love will surely die inside us all
feelings but pass wilt away
and the body will surely wither so
the heart beat but no more
the soul will surely but pass on
to another time another place
but here on mortal land
we will be held so close
their love for us surely will live on
and the memory of all we did
all we ever touched
will remain and reside
in those that love/loved us so
though whilst they stand and weep
at that bleak dark hole
or fiery curtain of despair
miss us they surely will
beg and plead for us to return
unto their outstretched arms
they will but ask
but when alone with thoughts
least they know that we have found
a better place were we can reside
in a hallowed peace we will lie
and sleep we be
now and for eternally more

loved and never forgotten

I miss you Grandad Stewart so very much
now and forever more

Saturday, 29 November 2008


Too your bed let yourself carry upon your pillow
lay your head rest easy now and slowly drift
release the weary day let go of the stressed mind
no hooded claws or vampires will come knocking at your door
reach out and touch the sky dance with the stars
swim in the delights of the milky way
as you turn and sigh in utter comfort
know that this is your personal bliss
feel the moment and breath but deep
let loose a sigh of utter contentment
for no matter how long you sleep
safe you will be from the night that does loom outside your window so
because right by your side I will be
over you....

Hand In Hand:

This journey this moment me and you together
walking like this hand in hand tis been but a while
and now your hand your touch feels but like mine
before I walked alone this dusty track
and I noticed how often it was cold dark and bleak
my demons walked by my side laughing taunting at me so
and all that I did threatening me inside my mind and body
retreated I did run I tried but the crows just circled closer to me
then upon a cross roads I did stumble and there stood was you
beautiful to the eye a sight to behold even if I didn't see you ever again
Turning to me you asked if I knew the way I replied I didn't
but that I was going that way so and pointed to the future
you did but turn and ask may I walk with you so no matter the distance
hesitant was I cautious so but took your offer and we begun
on we walked and little by little
the demons and spectres of sorrow vanished by the way side
falling like ashen tears leaving a pale glow long ago felt before
seeing the sun rise afore me I did but see your beautiful smile
my hand you did take and close you held it
and together towards the sun we but walked
uttering words of comfort and tenderness
proffesions of deep felt emotions
I have but come to realise your not leave my side so
of course the rain falls still and the mocking laughter still resounds
but now it falls upon these deafened ears
and my umbrella you do hold for me so
and its then I realise we have but surely just begun
to become but one in this journey that is ours....


Fallen Angels around me so
seeing their faces of utter despair
wreaked of havoc and crying shame
how they turn in tortured grimace
their reason taken and lost
but for us a saving grace
to reach out and hold you so
my personal saviour my only saint
your teachings and wisdom your council and grace
fly from me now and show me the sun
let me feel its warmth on me again
and allow me to walk once again
with a smile hold my hand and never let it go
and touch my soul stir my unbeating heart
as so I may feel but alive once more
fallen I have been lifted I surely am
within you and around you
taking me to places of utter desire and need
keeps me but contemplating of you
my fallen angel....


How much changes as we get older
so much has passed by in my life so
each still evoking emotions deep
to have been in the midest of dispair
and the darkened rooms of echoes
halls of discontent still reside inside
but each day is further from the nitemares
that try to linger on with their unfetted claws
remembering back long ago
I wondered would I ever make it so
through the screams of pitiful memories
and I realise the things I have seen
the moments I have touched and been touched
has but made me who I am now
and whilst I'm not the person
they profess I should be
I am but simply me
this life has moulded me turned me twisted me
to this very point and time
and when I look back
I do but see the faces of the fallen
those that have laid down and given in
and them that were simply beaten down
by those left with the charge to protect us
and now looking in the said mirror
yesterday today and tomorrow
I live with the memory of all that has been
with the devout promise to make it
through to the other side
were I hope those long gone
will reside with a smile upon their face
so for me for them and those that will be
fight the good fight

Self Tainted:

To take and not receive back
to endlessly give and not receive
as to why and whether this is so
never dawns the mind inside
until one day you stand
and realise you are but empty
to the very core
tainted and confused
beggar's belief that I'm like this
I have often pondered the very people
that seek to rid me of all my energy
they desire to leave me empty
and walk away without giving back
and I'm left surely thinking
was it worth it so
but to me my mind and ways
I will always strive to give unto them
for in the hope one day
they will return said time and values
and in that moment
one can find someone
who is true to me my ways and my morality
In that time and place
I have but reached out and found
the preciousness of all life

Self Forgiveness:

Ours is the walking wounded
on every face we see
on every street we walk
the faces tell a million lines
a thousand stories
each person everyone
living in fear of the coming
of another day
where and when how and why
does it do this say it so
reflections paused no time to stop
must race on to the next point
nothing taken nothing gleaned
and so each line
that of the walking wounded
left to track and trace
upon their face....

Trust And Belief

As i sit and watch the rain fall
I ponder how its come to this
illness and mire deep inside
affecting the very core
of what is my tender soul
my mind just distant echoes
as they ring out down vacant halls
down the rain does fall
each drop but a crystal ball
that holds the dreams of once afore
as they fall and shatter
I lose but another moment
watching as they run down
the window pane collecting in masses
I realise just how futile it is
to try to reach out and hold them so
what will be will be says the inner mind
I sigh and let go and feel tears rolling by
each one matching the drops of rain so
and from aside of me
I feel a hand reach
holding in it so
is but one of my tears
your dreams I hold in my palm
and never let go will I
safe with me always are you
and together these dreams will surely be
all we ever need them to be
I smile and turn and there you stand
beautiful and tender
chosen you have to each and everyday
hold me close keep my dreams safe
and my heart and soul close
unto you
now and forever more....


The way you come unto me how you touch me so
when your flesh but meets mine it courses like that of electric
turning and turning over and over
wrapped in sheets of white
as if kings and queens of another world
your hands in mine
our lips pressed as one the final sacrement given all at once
passing words lingering stares
the midest touch of a lovers hand lingers forever in these deep and echoed halls and all the while when I close my eyes I see you running through them so lighting my world touching my soul now and forever more....


Not everything is at it seems it isnt always how we want it need it to be desire it to be but each and everyday we rise to the dawning of a new day hoping that this day this moment will be better then the one afore do I so wish do I so pray Nay I leave but to the day that it may guide me so and reveal unto to me its all but meaningful learning curve..

Welcome to the wondeful life that is you.